IN LOVE
His mouth
Moves around
Her neck, sending shivers
Over her body, her heart quivers
In love
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DOORWAYS
Mouths
Mouths
Supple, round
Searching, wondering, feeling
Steal hearts and air
Steal hearts and air
Doorways
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Above photography by Lisa Michelle Arhontidis
Her photos and wonderful interview can be found at One Stop Poetry
These are my first attempts at a cinquain for One Stop Poetry -- picture prompt challenge! Thought I would write two different styles of them -- "Doorways" had been removed earlier but thought I should re-post it.
In love, few words with defined meaning, a very good write
ReplyDeleteWell done! Especially like the lines that rhyme shivers/quivers. Nice use of the cinquain. Cheers
ReplyDeleteso few and yet so much - grear write!
ReplyDeleteNicely done! lover of doorways...
ReplyDeleteA wonderful expression of `In Love`
ReplyDeleteAnita.
a picture is worth a thousands words...not true in this case. tight write. In love with this one.
ReplyDeletei love it..Helena..your simple words reach the deepest emotions, great one here!
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone! I appreciate your comments very much. :)
ReplyDeletei love that you start with "his mouth" and let it stand alone for a moment in this first line...gives a very oral feeling to your words
ReplyDeleteBoth poems equally fit this photograph! Gorgeous writing! ~ :)April
ReplyDeleteI don't know which poem I like best -- they are both beautiful.
ReplyDeleteTerse. Sparse and lovely.
Doorways I think I liked better by comparison. Cool diamante (I think). Here's mine http://thelunaticsdiary.blogspot.com/2010/12/dreams-are-never-eternal.html
ReplyDeleteWell executed works both. I liked your formal approach with the emotional subject.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully said in few words. It is difficult to do, you have done it well.
ReplyDeleteWysteria
Short forms are challenging, but I enjoyed both of your cinquains. "Steal hearts and air"...I'm lovin that!
ReplyDeleteBoth of those poems work for the photo - and by themselves. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI do so like cinquains...can express so much in so few words. Really makes you think for every word you're putting out there. You've utilized them well, and given us a lovely expression.
ReplyDeleteLike your cinquains indeed
ReplyDeletethanks Helena for letting us enjoy your beauty in words
Moonie hugs
described it beautifully. Love Doorways although both are lovely!
ReplyDeletethank you
thank you for your visit and comment