Sunday, December 5, 2010

In love


 IN LOVE

His mouth
Moves around
Her neck, sending shivers
Over her body, her heart quivers
In love


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DOORWAYS

Mouths
Supple, round
Searching, wondering, feeling
Steal hearts and air
Doorways


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Above photography by Lisa Michelle Arhontidis
Her photos and wonderful interview can be found at One Stop Poetry

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These are my first attempts at a cinquain for One Stop Poetry -- picture prompt challenge! Thought I would write two different styles of them -- "Doorways" had been removed earlier but thought I should re-post it.
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19 comments:

  1. Kodjo DeynooDecember 5, 2010 at 10:04 AM

    In love, few words with defined meaning, a very good write

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  2. dustusDecember 5, 2010 at 10:33 AM

    Well done! Especially like the lines that rhyme shivers/quivers. Nice use of the cinquain. Cheers

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  3. Another Man's DreamDecember 5, 2010 at 10:38 AM

    so few and yet so much - grear write!

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  4. ReflectionsDecember 5, 2010 at 10:39 AM

    Nicely done! lover of doorways...

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  5. Anita MagdalenaDecember 5, 2010 at 10:56 AM

    A wonderful expression of `In Love`

    Anita.

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  6. JerryDecember 5, 2010 at 10:59 AM

    a picture is worth a thousands words...not true in this case. tight write. In love with this one.

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  7. Desert RoseDecember 5, 2010 at 11:09 AM

    i love it..Helena..your simple words reach the deepest emotions, great one here!

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  8. Helena MalheurDecember 5, 2010 at 11:28 AM

    Thanks everyone! I appreciate your comments very much. :)

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  9. ClaudiaDecember 5, 2010 at 11:30 AM

    i love that you start with "his mouth" and let it stand alone for a moment in this first line...gives a very oral feeling to your words

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  10. AnonymousDecember 5, 2010 at 12:04 PM

    Both poems equally fit this photograph! Gorgeous writing! ~ :)April

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  11. Louise GallagherDecember 5, 2010 at 12:40 PM

    I don't know which poem I like best -- they are both beautiful.

    Terse. Sparse and lovely.

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  12. batsickDecember 5, 2010 at 12:55 PM

    Doorways I think I liked better by comparison. Cool diamante (I think). Here's mine http://thelunaticsdiary.blogspot.com/2010/12/dreams-are-never-eternal.html

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  13. BeachannyDecember 5, 2010 at 1:01 PM

    Well executed works both. I liked your formal approach with the emotional subject.

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  14. WysteriaDecember 5, 2010 at 1:24 PM

    Beautifully said in few words. It is difficult to do, you have done it well.

    Wysteria

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  15. FireblossomDecember 5, 2010 at 4:28 PM

    Short forms are challenging, but I enjoyed both of your cinquains. "Steal hearts and air"...I'm lovin that!

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  16. GlynnDecember 5, 2010 at 6:03 PM

    Both of those poems work for the photo - and by themselves. Well done.

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  17. AnonymousDecember 5, 2010 at 7:38 PM

    I do so like cinquains...can express so much in so few words. Really makes you think for every word you're putting out there. You've utilized them well, and given us a lovely expression.

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  18. moondustwriterDecember 5, 2010 at 8:38 PM

    Like your cinquains indeed

    thanks Helena for letting us enjoy your beauty in words

    Moonie hugs

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  19. HopeDecember 5, 2010 at 10:19 PM

    described it beautifully. Love Doorways although both are lovely!
    thank you

    thank you for your visit and comment

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I welcome constructive critisism; I am not fragile so go for it -- tell me what you really think!

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